Monday, April 20, 2009

Eye before "p"

To all optically-challenged BPM readers,

If without your eye-corrective wear, you see this 1.5 inch tall bottle and think it's a bottle of eye drops... is not. It is a small bottle of antibiotic numbing agent for our toddler's recent ear infection. In fact, much pain will ensue if you use said liquid as eye drops. And, by much pain I mean a level of burn discomfort likened to what a newborn chinchilla would feel should it be birthed on the surface of the sun and immediately vaccinated with 63 ammonia injections. Imagine a full grown 200lb man doubled over trying not to scream like a little girl working to peel a 2ml thick piece of plastic out of an eye who's eyelids are in such despair they will under no circumstances short of death seem to release their hold on the liquid fire engulfing the eyeball.

What eye I should have seen to have avoided the scenario...

Never again will my brain process OTIC as OPTIC when in a blurry hurry.

Special thanks to poison control, the very kind eye surgeon who took our call, overnight eye ointment and the sink for 20 minutes of eye rinsing for helping restore my vision to a mostly normal state.

- Mr. Blonde


designHER Momma said...

I am crying for you right now mr. blonde. it's kinda funny but really not at all. ouch.

Anonymous said...

This is one of those stories that is funny only because it didn't happen to you. I laughed and laughed when reading the story but know I would've cried like a big baby if it would've happened to me. Thanks for the chuckle.
-Terra H.